Falling into the Stars.

Many years ago, when asked my definition of Life, I answered by saying,

“Life is awareness making love with existence.”

Nothing has happened to change my mind, except that I could now add that since life is often measured in time by humans, then it is the awareness of the acquisition of new data that allows humans to experience time.  I can be awareness unbounded by time when I decide to stop counting data and dive into the ever-present awareness of Existence, and travel as one with the river, rather than as some bit of land floating between its banks.

Because it is whenever I dare to risk it all—to let go of it all for a grand adventure, to leave the shallows, and to flow into the ocean with the tide—that the most beautiful miracles occur. Adventures begin when I let go of what I know, lift the sail of curiosity, and sail off the map of the  “known.”  Fortunately, there are other grand adventurers and we often travel together, in pairs or in small tribes.

I think back to the times I have stood on mountain tops and have left this body to fly over the tops of nearby peaks, or have fallen asleep in high mountain cairns—those small sanctuaries of stone against the high winds—and have felt Me leave this body and fall headlong into the stars.  Within my mind is this flying thing, and it can take me to other places on wings of thought. My eyes pull me into the stars, while the starlight spins sleep in my body.  I am cradled in starlight when I sleep in high places.

I have slept in small boats, rocked by soft waves, alone on a world of water.  But the stars are there to guide me, and I am at home with the stars.  Leaving the world of safe behind, one can find flying fishes on algae-lit waters.   Where some see danger I see only Existence.

My totem is the dragonfly.  Dragonflies are superb under sudden pressure changes, abrupt turns at high speeds, and at maneuvering through obstacle courses. I didn’t pick this totem, but it seems to fit.  I like that. Being able to make fast changes makes life more interesting, and brings a lot more data to synthesize as well.  Enjoying Existence is about gathering data, and playing with the new knowledge.

Dragonflies and Forest Fairies live where I live.  We share this bit of land. There are also mushrooms, cacti, bitterroot, and ladybugs here.  We are all bits of life enjoying Existence.

Soon, the dragonflies will be starting their young in the pond.  I started to write “my” pond, but it is the pond of us all; of me, the deer, the raccoons and skunks, the chipmunks and fox, the elk and jackrabbits, the cottontail and coyote.  It is the pond of the water beetles, and of snails, of water lilies and cat tails, of swamp grasses and moss and mint.  It is the pond of the dragonflies.  Ours is a shared, cooperative ownership.  We honor each other in our sharing.

And when I fall asleep on the high ground, with the only light the stars above me, I leave it behind—pond riverbanks and all—and fall into the stars.

Falling into the stars is immersing myself in the river of Existence, flowing with the tide of time.  My awareness folds into Existence, and I know I am one with Life.  I feel the wings of the Dragonfly, and the soft fur of the rabbit, and the grass growing beneath me. There is nothing better than messing around in all Existence.


28 April, 2010

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